Sleeping it off

We had a pretty big first week. At home. Alone. Together.

3 weeks

We accomplished:

2 baths each

...Kinda normal for a baby. Kinda gross for a grown up. Rankin's first bath was in the kitchen which was a terrible idea because warm water + inexperience = pee pee in the bowl of chocolate malted Easter candy.

A trip to Auditorium Shores to let the dog swim

...We called dad in a panic when we forgot how to fold up the fancy new jogging stroller.

Dinner at Eastside Cafe to celebrate Greatmom's 86th birthday

...Oh how i miss restaurants

Watched approximately 17 movies ranging in tone from Black Swan to Outrageous Fortune ...That's the one starring Shelley Long and Bette Middler if you're not familiar. I leave HBO on in the living room all night long so when the boy wakes up to eat I take in a solid 30 minutes of whichever cinematic gem happens to be on at 2am and again at 5am.

This is going to be one heck of a weekend (for a pregnant lady)

Friday 11am: I may not be able to drink, eat sushi, or play soccer but by God I am allowed to get my hair highlighted. Thank goodness because I'm almost a brunette at this point. Someone might start taking me seriously if I let it go on any longer.

Friday 9pm: The Jordans first gig since our return to Austin and what will likely be our last gig pre-baby. I pretty much have to hold my bass like a shotgun while I play. According to Brian it makes me look like Johnny Cash. Compliment? From Brian, absolutely.

Saturday 11am: My baby shower! So excited to see all of my wonderful friends and family. Plus it's going to be fun to see what kind of fun things Peanut will have the opportunity to poop/throw up on.

Saturday night/Sunday: My BFF and her fiance are in town as well as my sister-in-law and her super cute family so who knows what the rest of the weekend will hold? Maybe I'll go nuts and drink more than one non-alcoholic beer? Or eat an entire cupcake without cutting it in half first and pretending like that's all I want? Perhaps we'll go to dinner and I'll order a steak "medium" instead of "well done" like the doctor instructed me? What if we all go dancing and stay out past 9pm!?! Wow, I'm already tired from these hypothetical shenanigans.

Quotes from Childbirth Class

"Oh Roger, Oh Roger, Oh Roger...[sees baby's head crowning]...that doesn't look like a baby."

--Lady in birthing video

"[Scream] Brian, her teeth are falling out! Are my teeth going to fall out?!?"

--Squawked by me during birthing video (They were not teeth but ice chips, thank the Lord.)

Man: I've never seen that before.

Wife: Never?

Man: Never.

-- A couple sitting next to us after seeing a baby's head crown in a birthing video. The guy kept his head down for the rest of the video while his wife rubbed his back.

"I should bring a flask to the next class."

--Brian, to another guy as a joke

"I'm going to bring a flask to the next class."

--Other guy to Brian, for serious

"I can't believe there's one of those in my stomach."

--Me, looking into the room of brand new babies on our hospital tour

"Do I have to pick just one?"

--A mom-to-be during our lesson about medication options

"Now lean against your partner, or if you're alone, the wall."

--Narrator in childbirth video

"There's the creepy shower."

--Me on the hospital room tour referring to all of the women in the birthing videos who sit naked in the shower hosing themselves down.

My Patented Philosophy on Motherhood

Being 31 weeks pregnant, I have already been asked a slew of questions about where I stand on various matters of motherhood. And I hugely admire the ability of many moms to form strong convictions and definitively answer "yes or no" on every issue.

However, when it comes to child birthing/rearing/feeding/etc I have settled on my own personal philosophy and I stand behind it 100%:

We'll see.

It is the perfect answer to every question they throw at us pregnant ladies:

Will you get an epidural?

We'll see. If I show up to the hospital and my body is raring to go, probably not. But if my lady parts decide that instead of a sprint, they want to run a marathon, then absolutely!

Cloth diapers or disposable?

We'll see. I ordered 6 cloth diapers and they seem to work more or less like disposable diapers. If it's not too much trouble and they're not super leaky, then cloth it is. If I clog up my brand new washing machine with baby poo in the first week and no one wants to hold my kid for fear of getting gooed on, then the environment can kiss it.

Are you going to nurse?

We'll see. I sure hope so. I really want to. But if me or the baby is hard of nursing I won't hold it against either of us.

How long will the baby sleep in your room?

We'll see. It seems so scary to be responsible for keeping a tiny human safe from harm. I'm not sure how long that anxiety will take to wear off.

Will you go back to work?

We'll see. I'm mentally preparing to stay home and tackle this motherhood thing one on one. And I'm looking forward to it....as of now. But if I start going nuts and we can't afford diapers (here's hoping the cloth thing works out) then back to work it is.

How many kids are you going to have?

We'll see. My pregnancy so far has been awesome and if things stay this way, maybe I'll keep at it until they give us our own reality show. But if having a newborn goes the way I know it can and probably will, I might just cover my gender bases and call it a day.

Ultimately, what I like about my philosophy is that no one can hold me to anything. If I say "oh yeah, I'm only going to use cloth diapers and epidurals are for weenies" then I have to follow through or suffer the indignities of mom failure. But with my patented "We'll see" method, I can be like a mid-90s rapper and just free flow through motherhood. But unlike a rapper, my plan is bullet-proof!

Skincare Addiction Update: It's been ages (but we haven't been aging!)

It's been awhile since my last skincare post. But I've come across a couple of new products that I'm anxious to try:

Face Serum

I'm always on the hunt for a serum that works but doesn't cost a million dollars. I swear the difference between the word lotion and the word serum is $100. Since my last post I decided to go a more natural route with Fresh's soy serum.

It was cheaper than the DDF serum I posted about before and I think just as good. However, I do like trying new things so I'm about to try this one called Yes to blueberries from the brand Yes to carrots. I've always been interested in the organicness of this brand. And it's only $20!

Loose Powder

I don't have as nearly much passion for make up as I do for skincare. BUT I do make note when I come across something good like this Clinique powder for people who have rosacea or really sensitive skin. I don't have a ton of redness but I don't like to wear foundation so maybe this will even out my skin tone.

New Line of Products

This is exciting. Dr. Perricone has a new (lower priced) line of products called Super. I've never bought his products because they were so expensive but I read an article about him ages ago and his approach to face care makes a lot of sense. It's all about what you eat and the products you use. He's the reason I started forcing raw salmon down my gullet- all in the name of beauty.

Moisturizer Disclaimer

It has come to my attention that I failed to note on my previous post that my skin type is pretty dry. So the fact that I slather on Cetaphil's Cream every morning and night is probably too much for those with normal to oily skin. (It even makes me break out sometimes in the summer so I only use it once a day then. But in my crazy head I would rather have pimples than wrinkles.) Cetaphil makes a lotion that is lighter than the cream that could work but also, some people may not even need to put anything on between serum and sunscreen in the AM or anything after serum in the PM. I am jealous of all of you because the oilier your skin the less wrinkles you will have!

Crazy pregnancy stuff the movies did not prepare me for:

Up until last August when I found out I was pregnant, all of my information about pregnancy came from the movies. Well, I have a HUGE bone to pick with Hollywood.

1. Pregnant ladies look cute clothed but CRAZY naked.

I'm not sure how Demi Moore and Vanity Fair were able to pull it off. One time I was walking in London and passed by a dude with huge goiter. I get the same feeling of "what the ---" when I glimpse myself in the full length mirror.

2. A baby doesn't kick one cute time.

At least not this baby. He kicks and kicks and kicks. And not when I'm running around doing stuff and not likely to notice. But when I lay down to go to sleep or watch fine cinema (such as Working Girl starring Melanie Griffith) he becomes a karate instructor in the dojo of my uterus. (I sound whiney, but I actually love when he kicks- at least 95% of the time. Although, a heads up would've been nice.)

3. Maternity clothes are only available in one style: cute.

Even places that have awesome regular clothes (i.e. Topshop) think the second the egg is fertilized that all we want to wear are ruffles and bows and "cute" patterns. If someone met me right now they would think I shop at Pottery Barn and watch RomComs all the livelong day. (Full disclosure: I did buy some curtains at Pottery Barn and I do watch RomComs but only on Sunday afternoons on TBS.) Case in point: I'm going to Vegas for a bachelorette party this weekend and they do NOT sell sequin mini dresses at Pea in the Pod.

4. Goat cheese wants to hurt my baby.

Upon getting knocked up, I totally understood that I couldn't accidentally drink a bottle of wine by myself anymore. And I knew that if I were a smoker/IV drug user, that I'd have to lay off that for awhile, too. But goat cheese? Deli meat? Decently cooked steak? And they make it sound even scarier than wine/cigarettes/drugs. Apparently, just one bad contaminated Greek salad could be the end.

5. Not one single person I've talked to has said giving birth is easy.

It's weird. By now, I've asked dozens and dozens of people and no one has mixed things up by saying "Birth? That was easy peasy." I'd really like to chat with the women on the show "I didn't know I was pregnant." They really make pregnancy look like a piece of cake.

That's all I've got for now. I'll follow up with more as they come. (Minus the yucky stuff that you really should only learn from baby books.)

Furniture Rehab

Unlike our move up to NYC when we moved our stuff ourselves (read: Brian moved our stuff), for our move back to Austin we hired an evil moving company that I wouldn't recommend to my arch nemesis or any of the girls who were mean to me in 6th grade.

As is usual with moving companies they charged by the pound so we got rid of every piece of furniture we didn't truly love. And then we got home to Austin and nowhere to sit, put books, or store clothes.

So...I've been on the hunt for Amy Winehouse furniture: pieces that have done some hard living so no one else wants them anymore. I'm thinking with some intense rehab their good qualities can really shine through and they might even go on to have a successful career.

Project 1: Faux Bamboo Etagere

After looking at photos like these, I'd been wanting this style book shelf for months. Online they were all $1500+ which is silly business. Then one day I was having a half-hearted romp through craigslist and found one in Tarrytown for $45!! I went to pick it up and felt kinda guilty taking it from the nice lady. But not guilty enough to say anything. You can see I tacked on the paint colors I was considering. Ultimately, I've decided on a shiny black lacquer. And I'm smart enough to not do this project myself. I found a guy who will do it for $350 which seems like some expensive lipstick for a $45 pig but I think I'll be happier if I let a pro do handle this one.

Project 2: Fancy Arm Chair

I found this chair at the Home Consignment Center. It was $100 which was the high end of the chairs I was looking at, but it's in great condition and will only take 3/4ths to 1 yard of fabric to recover. Of course my current fave fabric is the most expensive one I've looked at. Why does that always happen?

Project 3: Dresser for our bedroom

This fine specimen was actually given to us by Brian's mom from a friend of hers. (Ignore the tree shadows across it.) Unfortunately, the wood grain/stain didn't really "go" in our boudoir where we're doing kind of a shades of blue thing. Originally, I wanted to bluewash it but talked myself down from that kind of bold statement and instead we spent last weekend whitewashing it. It was my first time to undertake such a task but I think it went well.

Stay tuned for my follow up post where I unveil all of my "after" pictures. It might be awhile until they're all done but I've got a hard stop on March 27th (peanut's due date). There's nothing like a hurricane of life change to motivate you to get a few things done.